Meil kõigil tulevad oma piirid ette, mitte üksnes ande, vaid ka võimaluste poolest. Ent tihedamini, kui me seda arvamegi, on need piirid meie enda seatud. Me proovime, meid saadab ebaedu, ning me järeldame, et oleme oma võimaluste lae saavutanud. Või siis muudame kurssi pärast paari esimese sammu astumist. Mõlemal juhul ei läheme me oma teekonnal nii kaugele, kui võiksime.
lk 309
Ma usun, et meie liik ei püsi kaua. Me ei tundu olevat sellisest puust, mis on võimaldanud näiteks kilpkonnal eksisteerida enam-vähem muutumatuna sadu miljoneid aastaid ehk sadu kordi kauem, kui me üldse olemas oleme olnud. Kuulume lühiealisesse liigirühma. Kõik meie sugulased on juba välja surnud. Enamgi veel, me teeme kahju. Meie enda valla päästetud rängad kliima—ja keskkonnamuudatused jätavad meile vähe võimalusi. Planeedi Maa jaoks võivad need osutuda väikeseks, tähtususetuks välgatuseks, kuid ma ei usu, et elaksime need terve nahaga üle, eriti kuna avalik ja poliitiline arvamus eelistab jaanalinnu kombel pea liiva alla peita ja eirata neid ohte, kuhu praegu tormame.
lk 107–108
Building and sustaining the settings in which individuals can grow and unfold, not “kept in their place” but empowered to become all they can be, is not only the task of parents and teachers, but the basis of managament and political leadership—and simple friendship.
lk 56
…she was largely unaware that being female can be just as much of disadvantage as being black. “You’ve got to get out of the household at least for a moment to meet up with the race question, but you wake up every day meeting the gender queation, so you donät even notice it. It’s pretty intimate.”
lk 44
Isegi õnneliku elu juurde kuulub omajagu pimedust ning sõna “õnnelik” kaotaks oma tähenduse, kui seda ei tasakaalustaks kurbus.
C. Jung
lk 285
The fine old idea of a path and a commitment turns out to be illusory for many people, not only for geographical and political refugees but for cultural refugees displaced by the discontinuities of custom and economy. Even those who continue to wear the same professional label survive only because they have altered what they do. Being effective as a banker or a restaurateur or a general means that one has relearned one’s craft more than once.
lk 9
Multiple studies in multiple industries show that women often judge their own perfomance as worse than it actually is, while men judge their own perfomance as better than it actually is.
lk 29
If change were less frightening, if the risks did not seem so great, far more could be lived.
lk 8
(Dr. Peggy McIntosh) explained that many people, but especially women, feel fraudulent when they are praised for their accomplishments. Instead of feeling worthy of recogntion, they feel underserving and guilty, as if a mistake has been made. Despite being high achivers, even experts in their fields, women can’t seem to shake the sense that it is only a matter of time until they are found out for who they really are—imposters with limited skilles or abilities.
lk 28
Today, the materials and skills which a life is composed are no longer clear. It is no longer possible to follow the paths of previous generations. This is true for both men and women, but it is especially true fo woman, whose whole lives no longer need be dominated by the rhythms of procreation and the dependencies that these created, but who still must live wiht the discontinuities of female biology and still must balance confliciting demands. Our lives not only take new directions; they are subject to repeated redirection, partly because of the extensions of our years of health and productivity. Just as the design of a building or of a vase must be rethought when the scale is changed, so must the design of lives. Many of the most basic consepts we use to construct a sense of self or the design of a life have changed their meanings: Work. Home. Love. Commitment.
lk 2
Teisisõnu, me muutume siis, kui meil on vaja muutuda. Vajadus on kohanemise ema.
lk 108
… et südikus tõesti suureneb sedamööda, kuidas me hakkame aduma oma elufilosoofiat, õpime pärast ebaõnnestumist ja pettumisi end taas jalule ajama ning omandame oskuse teha vahet madala ja kõrgema taseme eesmärkidel. Küpsemise versiooni olemus seisneb selles, et vanemaks saades kujundame me endas oskuse säilitada kirglikkust ja visadust ka pikemas perspektiivis.
lk 106
Professional ambition is expected of men but is optional—or worse, sometimes even a negative—for women. “She is very ambitous” is not a compliment in our culture. Aggressive and hard-charching women violate unwritten rules about acceptable social conduct. Men are continually applauded for being ambitious and poweful and successful, but women who display these same traits often pay social penalty.
lk 17
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